Sexual orientation?

• Cucurbita wrote on 2011-01-12 20:05

  Quote from Zackeh;287919:

  I think Bi would "I don't know". You have to pick one or the other. (Just my opinion, I wouldn't know :\)

  
  
  You definitely wouldn't know if you can say that.
• Mama wrote on 2011-01-12 20:09

  Quote from Cucurbita;287898:

  Seemed that way to me.
  
  I dated an asexual for two years. She was straight in that she liked men, but the thought of kissing/sex/etc never crosses her mind and she finds it repulsive, much like a child would. However she was still interested in the idea of romance and was willing to court. She was committed, but there was no real passion.

  
  
  I see.. I find it unusual, and makes me think that somehow they don't react to androgens properly or simply don't make enough testosterone, or maybe even did not have appropriate levels of prolactin. Was she easily stressed out or depressed? Really skinny or small? (in hindsight that wouldnt be good information anyway.. a lot of people get stressed/depressed easily)
  
  actually I'll stop there, pinning a probable cause is probably biting off more than I can chew. *runs to class
  
  edit: to zackeh, yeah rain got it correct. behaviour is one thing, actual orientation is another.
• Akemii wrote on 2011-01-12 20:10
  I am bisexual.
• Cucurbita wrote on 2011-01-12 20:36

  Quote from Mama;287954:

  I see.. I find it unusual, and makes me think that somehow they don't react to androgens properly or simply don't make enough testosterone, or maybe even did not have appropriate levels of prolactin. Was she easily stressed out or depressed? Really skinny or small? (in hindsight that wouldnt be good information anyway.. a lot of people get stressed/depressed easily)
  
  actually I'll stop there, pinning a probable cause is probably biting off more than I can chew. *runs to class
  
  edit: to zackeh, yeah rain got it correct. behaviour is one thing, actual orientation is another.

  
  
  Yeah no one really knows the reason. But they're happy the way they are because they don't know what they don't have.
  
  Its like you're staying innocent like a child forever. This doesn't deter you from making an adult lifestyle since it doesn't mean you're lacking maturity. So there isn't a huge issue behind this.
• Phunkie wrote on 2011-01-12 20:41
  Yeah, bisexual is like liking apples and oranges, but choosing to eat one or the other at a single time. (Then again, there's people who eat both at the same time. CRAZY ORGIES.)
  
  Sexual orientation is about who you're attracted to, not who you're dating or sleeping with. Also, there's people who are straight, but sleep with gay men and yet don't identify as gay or bi.
• Akemii wrote on 2011-01-12 20:49

  Quote from Phunkie;287977:

  Yeah, bisexual is like liking apples and oranges, but choosing to eat one or the other at a single time. (Then again, there's people who eat both at the same time. CRAZY ORGIES.)
  
  Sexual orientation is about who you're attracted to, not who you're dating or sleeping with. Also, there's people who are straight, but sleep with gay men and yet don't identify as gay or bi.

  
  It dun't have to be an orgy. ;-;
• Mama wrote on 2011-01-12 22:56

  Quote from Cucurbita;287972:

  Yeah no one really knows the reason. But they're happy the way they are because they don't know what they don't have.
  
  Its like you're staying innocent like a child forever. This doesn't deter you from making an adult lifestyle since it doesn't mean you're lacking maturity. So there isn't a huge issue behind this.

  
  
  i like to think theres a reason for everything, but sometimes it's just something you're born with; which makes me think of predispositions you're born with like many other 'disorders' that you can't control... then i think about hormones... then i start rambling, especially since a small imbalance of something like prolactin or serotonin means a total loss of libido. I wana learn about everything.
  
  and yea, it's the same reason people don't mind homosexuals since they're contributing members of society like any other person. It's just that they can't pass on their genes of course.
  
  @phunks.. dont have orgies plox, think of the STDs D:
• Phunkie wrote on 2011-01-12 22:59

  Quote from Mama;288127:

  @phunks.. dont have orgies plox, think of the STDs D:

  
  
  Yeah, STDs suck.
  
  THANK YOU MAMA.
  
  

  Quote from Pride;287983:

  It dun't have to be an orgy. ;-;

  
  
  Group sex = orgy. It can include a threesome, a foursome, etc.
  
  I was just saying that there are bisexuals out there who do have sex with both genders at the same time, compared to the more-common person who dates one person exclusively at one time.
• Haydrian wrote on 2011-01-13 02:07

  Quote from Mama;287377:

  after reading your posts asexuality seems to me like a result of hormonal imbalance (or lack thereof), where the passion is not there but intimacy and commitment is. I have not studied the topic ofc so I could be wrong.

  
  
  The controversy of all sexual orientations other than heterosexual is basically is it purely chemical or conscious or both. Generally as a rule of thumb any non-heterosexual sexual orientation can be viewed as having either an excessive amount of estrogen or testosterone in one's body. It's much to debate among psychiatrists and sexologists. However most commonly it is viewed as a purely conscious decision for a person to enjoy being with someone of the same gender or of transgender status, much less chemical. The studies in this have bred mixed results.
  The common story more so with asexuality is that there is no true idea of where it stems from. Whether it be repression of sexual desires causing trauma in the brain which leads to a lack in sex drive, or a decrease in testosterone which would cause the same. One could also argue that there is a tie in to imbalance of nutrients much like to some of the theories with bipolar which increases one's sex drive. These medical theories are what give me stronger evidence to asexuality being more of a condition than an orientation. As such asexual people are more often than not going to have a choice in either males or females or to enjoy both. Which would put them under the 3 basic sexual orientations just sans the sex drive of an average person.
  
  As for pansexuality and polysexuality...
  
  Pansexuality is in essence bisexuality. There have been numerous debates of whether or not this should be considered a sexuality as well. It's usually more commonly used in the GLBT communities usually for those who are bisexuals that also like transexuals and gender play. It's becoming more and more common and there have been debates/discussions of pansexuality becoming the new bisexuality. Polysexuality is basically the exact same thing as pansexuality. The difference being that it is for those that more or less change between straight and gay and are usually not attracted to transexuals which some pansexuals do not consider transgendered people any different than a bio-male or bio-female giving the two orientations a great deal of cross-over. Honestly I hardly consider polysexuality a sexual orientation considering it is basically another way of saying bisexual or pansexual depending on use.
  
  
  So, i know I was going to drop it but there is my final sentiments.
  
  Heterosexuality = Man+Woman
  Homosexuality = Man+Man or Woman+Woman
  Bisexuality = Man+Woman/Man or Woman+Man/Woman
  Pansexuality = Man+Woman/Man/Transgendered(FTM or MTF) or Woman+Man/Woman/Transgendered(FTM or MTF)
  
  Then:
  Asexuality = Lack of sexual attraction to any persons but can be either Hetero, homo, Bi, or Pan depending on their romantic preferences (if any).
  
  
  You can take this or leave this but considering Getrone seemed to find my view interesting and some on going debate I decided to post. I'm not saying i'm right but this is just what my experiences and past knowledge has lead me to stay by.
  
  
  I will gladly shut up now.
• Cynic wrote on 2011-01-13 02:40
  Uhh.. Pansexuality is in no way Bisexuality. First and foremost, Bisexuals look at people in 2 and ONLY two categories: men and women.
  Pansexuals look at people as people. That's it.
  Think of it this way; whall bisexuality sees pink and blue, all pansexual sees is grey.
  Furthermore, pansexuality is not judgmental on gender as-well.
• Haydrian wrote on 2011-01-13 02:57

  Quote from Cynic;288539:

  Uhh.. Pansexuality is in no way Bisexuality. First and foremost, Bisexuals look at people in 2 and ONLY two categories: men and women.
  Pansexuals look at people as people. That's it.
  Think of it this way; whall bisexuality sees pink and blue, all pansexual sees is grey.
  Furthermore, pansexuality is not judgmental on gender as-well.

  
  
  Erm... there in why I still consider it a legit orientation. I said BASICALLY not IS just in a fancy way. The difference between a pansexual and a bisexual is that pansexuals include transexuals (as well as unmentioned intersex people) where as bisexuals do not. Thus meaning that pansexuals are attracted to anyone reguardless of if they are bio-male, bio-female, transmale, transfemale, or intersex. Which yes in lamens terms means ANYONE. Which is what we apparently agree on yet you seem to think I don't.
  
  Perhaps i should've been more specific but I didn't want to get THAT into it since the topic can cause some people to feel unnerved when dealing with transexuals and intersex people. Plus the fact it IS a debated orientation and is often times compared to bisexuality and polysexuality when being described.
  
  
  

  Quote from Haydrian;288478:

  
  Pansexuality is in essence bisexuality. There have been numerous debates of whether or not this should be considered a sexuality as well. It's usually more commonly used in the GLBT communities usually for those who are bisexuals that also like transexuals and gender play. It's becoming more and more common and there have been debates/discussions of pansexuality becoming the new bisexuality. Polysexuality is basically the exact same thing as pansexuality. The difference being that it is for those that more or less change between straight and gay and are usually not attracted to transexuals which some pansexuals do not consider transgendered people any different than a bio-male or bio-female giving the two orientations a great deal of cross-over. Honestly I hardly consider polysexuality a sexual orientation considering it is basically another way of saying bisexual or pansexual depending on use.
  

  
  
  If for some reason you still think I'm an idiot. Fine, i'm an idiot.
• Mama wrote on 2011-01-13 03:41
  ah, thanks for the reply adrian, yeah that was my basic understanding as well, but i didnt consider transgenders etc. adding another dimension to pansexuality. I still believe its hard to tell whether or not you have true pansexuality or polysexuality vs bi until later in life.. >_> I don think ive ever even met a manwoman or transgender. perhaps the first hint would be with their feelings towards homosexuals since they're much more common.
  
  and Cynic, he covered all that in his formula thing at the bottom, but your metaphor was spot on.
  
  I still consider asexuality most puzzling out any of these orientations because of the complete lack of libido.
• Haydrian wrote on 2011-01-13 06:37

  Quote from Mama;288649:

  ah, thanks for the reply adrian, yeah that was my basic understanding as well, but i didnt consider transgenders etc. adding another dimension to pansexuality. I still believe its hard to tell whether or not you have true pansexuality or polysexuality vs bi until later in life.. >_> I don think ive ever even met a manwoman or transgender. perhaps the first hint would be with their feelings towards homosexuals since they're much more common.
  
  and Cynic, he covered all that in his formula thing at the bottom, but your metaphor was spot on.
  
  I still consider asexuality most puzzling out any of these orientations because of the complete lack of libido.

  
  
  Honestly the reason little debates can be brought upon in terms of sexuality is the intense amount of gray area between them. Even a straight man can have homosexual thoughts now and then. Now they can either call themself bi or bi curious or just straight. Someone who is dating a transexual can be either pansexual or depending on their outlook be straight or gay depending on chosen gender of the transexual. It's all gray and while Kinsey started the research decades ago, full on research on the topics of sexuality are still semi-taboo just in no way as extreme as when Kinsey did it and before hand. Because of this debates ensue and there is no 100% answer for someone's sexuality. Everyone will have at least 1 homosexual thought in their life time. If you say you haven't, your lying or have a lot of growing still to do.
  
  But anyway.. this turned into a debate I didn't intend to get into. I just wanted to add something simple and ditch as usual, but ah well. I'm not all that smart i've just lived an odd life. My English still isn't the greatest so I'm pretty poor at getting points across. I'll leave this to rest for real now. Just PM me if you want to talk more about it.