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JustNoOne wrote on 2011-07-13 05:11
A friend and I were discussing about life and well, I need to just say and tell it to others so I understand it again and get your comments and responses to this.
We discussed on how to get what we want, since I'm clueless on this subject, I let him talk and what he said made sense. To get what you want, we need the opportunity to obtain it, be it a: significant other, money or a job, we have to dress and act a specific way to obtain these things. We might be giving the chance to obtain what we want if we don't "dress for the occasion" or act different, but it won't be as frequent as if we did change.
After my friend told me this, something just stuck to my head, it made sense. When I look at myself, I think that I look smart and curious, but when others look at me, I look unenthusiastic and lazy, this is something I want to change because I'm not unenthusiastic and lazy, but I am hard-working and passionate. I want to look what I am inside, smart, curious, passionate, hard-working, experienced and a good listerner, the things I am or at least the things I want to strive to be.
I'm currently trying to look and act what I want to be but I don't know actually how since I've never done this before. What are your opinions about this and how may I achieve my goals? This had been bugging me for quite some time and I feel that since the Nation had the most intelligent amount of people of all the forums I go to, it would be best to hear your word on this.
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Shanghai wrote on 2011-07-13 05:22
I live a very care-free life. I'm pretty much open to any activity(other than eating) or I'll at least attempt to try to do something and see if I like it(unless it's food). If I don't like something, oh well. I'll either get used to it or like it eventually later in my life. Worse case scenario is if I do dislike something(only exception is food). Hating and being a total jerk to someone is something I hate and would never do to anyone, and my friends realize that. Most people counsel me for advice on lots of things, and I'll gladly give it, be it relationships/life/school.
As for getting the things you want, there's probably 2 scenarios. One where you can get something yourself without anyone helping you, and the other where you would need the help or assistance of friends/family to do so. Leaving a good impression on everyone you know is the best way for Scenario 2 to happen.
However, I do see your problem with people not knowing on how you truly feel about things. I have the same problem too, although it's with my parents since all they see me do every-day is on a computer and my reluctant attitude towards chores. Be more open to doing things, such as going Airsofting with a friend when you've never touched an Airsoft gun in your entire life, or going with a random group of friends you're not acquainted with to a movie or something. That's a way to get rid of your "lazy" perspective and make you feel more open and friendly,
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Phunkie wrote on 2011-07-13 05:25
What qualities about yourself do you consider unenthusiastic and lazy?
List them! And then maybe we can teach ya how to change them. :)
But hey, the first step is realizing what you want to do or change, so you're doing good so far!
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JustNoOne wrote on 2011-07-13 05:30
I don't consider myself to be unenthusiastic and lazy, but if there was anything that I would say that makes me seems so, it would be my self image. My face has always had this neutral position that made me look awkward and well, lifeless.
Right now, I'm trying to find a set of clothing that makes me look smart and enthusiastic, but it's not going so well >.< I was thinking of something like a dresshirt and boot cut jeans, but other than that, I can't think of anything else Dx
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Phunkie wrote on 2011-07-13 05:32
Quote from JustNoOne;510328:
I don't consider myself to be unenthusiastic and lazy, but if there was anything that I would say that makes me seems so, it would be my self image. My face has always had this neutral position that made me look awkward and well, lifeless.
Try smiling more often!
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Kollin wrote on 2011-07-13 05:39
if people intend to judge and treat me differently by my appearance, then i have no desire to interact with them. this is 90% of the world today, so my "firend list" isnt very long, though i prefer it this way.
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Mama wrote on 2011-07-13 05:51
Don't just be yourself, be the person you want to be. People aren't born great, they work hard and diligently until they do.
do your best.
It's not what you know, but who you know. Follow your heart, and don't do things the American way, which is getting what you want by stepping on other people.
I find happiness through love; giving and expecting nothing in return. It has worked without exception so far, for even when things go sour there are always people with deep meaningful connections that you can depend on. In other words... Hope.
hopefully that wasn't excessively corny or ideal, but that's just how I roll.
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Phunkie wrote on 2011-07-13 06:32
Quote from Mama;510350:
Don't just be yourself, be the person you want to be. People aren't born great, they work hard and diligently until they do.
do your best.
It's not what you know, but who you know. Follow your heart, and don't do things the American way, which is getting what you want by stepping on other people.
I find happiness through love; giving and expecting nothing in return. It has worked without exception so far, for even when things go sour there are always people with deep meaningful connections that you can depend on. In other words... Hope.
hopefully that wasn't excessively corny or ideal, but that's just how I roll.
I loved reading this! Definitely brought a smile to my face.
Thanks! :)
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Ryoko wrote on 2011-07-13 06:44
I live a pretty care-free life, with not a lot of stress, but sometimes I do have complaints.
Not afraid to try out things I haven't tried out before, to satisfy my curiosity. Pretty open-minded towards everything, and dedicated towards practically everything I take interest in.
Although, I like the dedication quality of mine, because it gives me somewhat of a competitive quality that helps a lot when I feel like I'm about to give up on something.
The only thing I don't think I'm enthusiastic enough towards things I don't take much of an interest in at first, but then I usually changes drastically if I put my mind to it.
I don't have a negative attitude towards things I dislike, but might not put in much of an effort to try unless I find some sort of inspiration, and then it just sets me off.
Live life positively, and if something negative comes up, don't dwell on it forever, otherwise it completely boggles your mind down from anything you try to put your mind to.
Positivity has its limits though, and I'm not afraid to accept that factor.
I also think I need to work on my self-image, because many people in my classes think that I should smile more...Which is pretty hard.
I also must admit, I'm somewhat ignorant towards people too sometimes, when I'm focused too much on something I take much interest in. But what else can I say, everyone is perfectly flawed in one way or another whether they realize it or not.
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Hiccup wrote on 2011-07-13 06:53
I live for myself and what makes me happy. It's very selfish, but I run my life. I learned not to live up to anyone else's expectations as well as not to care about their opinions unless its a close friend. What I do is for me, and that's all that it should be. Anything else is not needed/wanted. I took out all the negativity in my life and learned to accept that this is what it is, and this is what I want it to be. I've grown alot especially in the past 3 months so I'm just enjoying living day-day and having great company from my new besties.
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Chillax wrote on 2011-07-13 08:12
If you're trying to please everyone, you won't succeed. Besides, who tells you that you look unenthusiastic and lazy?
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Cynic wrote on 2011-07-13 13:35
The only reason I bother living life is for my Mom, to be honest. She's m'world (along with my animals) and the sole reason I get up in the morning and even bother doing anything is for her benefit.
I've got a long way to go of course, considering I've got far too many medical issues at the moment, but meh.
So long as I have her I'll live a determined, hard-working life.
If she passes away and I have nobody else to fill that spot (I doubt it), I'll just slip myself some arsenic and call it a day.
Not to sound at all depressing, though.
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Claudia wrote on 2011-07-13 14:30
Mmm, I don't really know how I live my life, or at least, I couldn't just sum it up in one word...
I guess some people would say i'm the pleasing type, but I really love being helpful to people no matter what. Sometimes I see it as "Well, I have nothing else important to do, so i'll help x out because they need it.", other times I think "Wow, it would really make this person's day!". And my mom expects me to help out around the house because nobody else is capable and because she knows that deep down, I know that she would be SOL without me. Knowing that somebody needs you feels good!
In general I try to be really positive, but sometimes I do get down, like everybody else does [or at least, I like to think so]. But then, I remember that some of it is really just beyond your control and you have to just roll with the punches. But either way, you have to pull yourself up by your bootstraps and carry on, because nothing changes if you don't change your situation.
I'm also more of a loner so I guess I do some things my own way and just don't care about what other people think.
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Phunkie wrote on 2011-07-13 21:56
I like making people smile. That's how I live my life. That's why I mascot during the summer and dance around like an idiot. I do it because it makes me happy to see other people happy. It really does.
I do think about myself and my needs, but I almost always put other people first. That's just the kind of person I am. Obviously, if I have an exam the next day, that's gonna be priority, but if someone close to me is having a terrible day, I'll drop everything I'm doing and lend that person an ear. That's how it always should be.
Yesterday, I received a really kind message on Facebook from someone I barely know and she just thanked me for all the kind remarks I would often leave on her page whenever I saw she was down. She called me wonderful and it really brought a smile to my face. I live for moments like that.
There's nothing like knowing that you are truly appreciated by someone else. And I like to share that.
You can't be too selfish in life, no matter what problems you're going through. Everybody has problems. Can't act like it's all about you.
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TA wrote on 2011-07-13 22:01
[video=youtube;sTJ7AzBIJoI]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sTJ7AzBIJoI[/video]
That pretty much sums it up.