Learn that failure is good

• Lan wrote on 2012-04-19 22:28

  This week, Neil Sjoberg, a youth worker and golf course manager from London suggests introducing a new subject at school called learning to lose.
  
  "For most of us in the working world, failure is a normal part of everyday life. Developing the skills to cope with failure is the key to personal success throughout life. But teachers at schools make pupils feel equally talented, because this makes them popular with the parents and pupils.
  
  "Schools avoid regular testing and rote learning. Some don’t spilt up year groups according to academic ability and give prizes to every child at sports day. Pupils therefore leave school vulnerable with a false sense of achievement, and they are frustrated and angry when they do not immediately succeed in the real working world.
  
  "So my solution is to introduce a compulsory “learning to lose” subject for all children, with a failure exam that they have to pass. Children would be told what their ranking is against the national average and then write about where they think they did worst.
  
  "Children need to be taught that failure is frequent and normal, it is not the end of the world and we should all help this by a cultural shift in admitting that we failed. Only by learning to lose can we achieve success."

  
  http://www.bbc.com/future/story/20120417-learn-that-failure-is-good
• RebeccaBlack wrote on 2012-04-19 22:44
  I don't think this negativity is the best way to go about it, but it's a good concept. People do need to learn that everyone isn't equally as good at everything and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and that in order for one person to win, someone else has to lose. It's the way things are, there aren't an unlimited amount of job positions or anything like that.
  
  [S]And man, it sure would be good to play some shooters without getting yelled at because people can't enjoy a game.[/S]
  
  There are positive ways to do this, though. The problem is that there may be 20 people in a race and a trophy, and most of them expect the trophy. The trophy should be an award of excellence that you put everything into for a chance to win if you do the best and not something that's given out to everyone who shows up or puts in effort or whatever. That would be a much more realistic view of life. Getting 2nd or 3rd out of 20 is still great and getting 19th either means more effort is needed or you had some great competition in the first place, perhaps both. The best of competitions are those with the toughest of opponents as there's more of an opportunity to improve and show how good you are. I hope younger people (and even older people!) will have an overall greater understanding of this in the future.
• Rin wrote on 2012-04-19 22:45
  I'd rather this school of teaching be applied to the previous generation more than mine.
• Spartaaaaa wrote on 2012-04-19 22:46

  "So my solution is to introduce a compulsory “learning to lose” subject for all children, with a failure exam that they have to pass.

  
  
  What if you fail the failure exam?
  :chomp2:
  
  Also, I think it's wrong to treat failure as being "good". There is a clear distinction between acknowledging/learning from failure and celebrating failure.
• Cynic wrote on 2012-04-19 22:47

  Quote from RebeccaBlack;842905:

  I don't think this negativity is the best way to go about it, but it's a good concept. People do need to learn that everyone isn't equally as good at everything and everyone has their strengths and weaknesses, and that in order for one person to win, someone else has to lose. It's the way things are, there aren't an unlimited amount of job positions or anything like that.
  
  [S]And man, it sure would be good to play some shooters without getting yelled at because people can't enjoy a game.[/S]

  
  
  ^
  
  There's only so much you can learn from failures, though. And it's not really good to dwell on them.
  
  My rule of thumb is you can be as mad/sad as you want when it occurs, but afterwards just take a deep breath, look at what you did wrong (if the failure was your fault, that is), try and learn and then move on.
  
  I know tons of people who constantly dwell on their past failures (especially when it wasn't their fault whatsoever but they insist on blaming themselves for some reason). Learning from them is a good thing, but dwelling on them is not.
• RebeccaBlack wrote on 2012-04-19 22:53
  I edited my original post to add a bit, looks like a lot of people posted quickly.
  
  I think this could have a lot of benefits, I'm just concerned that it could have an effect on self confidence if it's done wrong. And let's face it, it's probably going to be done wrong, especially if they go about it like this.
• Spartaaaaa wrote on 2012-04-19 22:57

  Quote from RebeccaBlack;842915:

  I edited my original post to add a bit, looks like a lot of people posted quickly.
  
  I think this could have a lot of benefits, I'm just concerned that it could have an effect on self confidence if it's done wrong. And let's face it, it's probably going to be done wrong, especially if they go about it like this.

  
  
  Ideally, this is something the parents should be teaching their children. Compulsory school programs tend to be really bad at dealing with social issues.
• RebeccaBlack wrote on 2012-04-19 23:00
  We also have to be realistic and realize that if parents continue to do a crappy job, someone's gotta do it. Blaming the parents, whether it's their fault or not, isn't gonna fix it. At least that's my take on it. We can only do what we ourselves can do.
• Karuta wrote on 2012-04-19 23:26
  "Simply by saying you've failed, you've admitted you attempted. And anyone who attempts is not a failure. Those who truly fail in my eyes are the ones who never try at all. The ones who sit on the couch and whine and moan and wait for the world to change for them. "
  
  ^ at least how I see it
  
  I'm not sure how much the class will help or really sure on other solutions, I just think being supportive of others is important. Helping others reach their goals and spreading positive encouragement to ensure people will keep trying, even if they fail ten or twenty more times while working their hardest.
  
  Maybe it's best to not focus on failure but rather on what you can do.
  
  and most of the time, you can always try again, work harder, find a new beginning, or even overcome the wall that once stood in your path.
• Chillax wrote on 2012-04-20 01:34
  Kobayashi Maru.