Am I gay? T-T

• Phunkie wrote on 2011-08-10 15:25
  Haha, I love how you can ask "Am I gay?" at the same time as, "Am I going through puberty?". That shows some sign of maturity, IMO.
  
  At this age, a lot of teenagers become curious about what they want, so it's quite common to have the feelings and fantasies you've been having. You may turn out straight in the long run, but that's entirely up to what you feel.
  
  Ask yourself next time you're thinking these thoughts...
  
  

  
  
  • Would I want to explore a relationship with another guy?
    
  • Do I think about any of these guys romantically? Or is it strictly sexually?
    
  • Do I see myself kissing any of these guys? Does that thought turn me on?
    

  
  
  You may just very well find the male body attractive and not want anything romantic with another guy. However, if you realize you're gay/bi in the long run, embrace it, don't push it away.
  
  It's always good to be truthful to yourself, no matter how difficult the situation is. The truth always sets you free. But of course, be careful. It can be hard for you depending where you live or who you live with.
  
  If you ever do come out of the closet, I hope the transition is easy for you.
• Retard wrote on 2011-08-10 18:09
  First things first, I do not see gayness as normal, but it certainly feels natural. If you don'tknow what I mean, heres a serious idea thats going through my head. I'm still atttracted to girls, so i don't think i could bring my self to marry a man. But i dream that if I do get married and have kids an all that, (dont laugh, its silly...) ill still have sexual affairs with this guy.
  
  I see him only for sex, but I can imagine at most seriously dating him (never to become married). Another thing, sometimes during these fantasies i'll randomly come to reality and think, (do i really think sucking weiner and get weiner shoved up my arse feels good? Skin tastes gross to me.) and also I hate tge traits of a steriotypical gay. Especially the voice, it may just because It reminds me of me, but i distance myself...
• Sleeperdial wrote on 2011-08-10 18:21

  Quote from Purrz24;547028:

  First things first, I do not see gayness as normal, but it certainly feels natural. If you don'tknow what I mean, heres a serious idea thats going through my head. I'm still atttracted to girls, so i don't think i could bring my self to marry a man. But i dream that if I do get married and have kids an all that, (dont laugh, its silly...) ill still have sexual affairs with this guy.
  
  I see him only for sex, but I can imagine at most seriously dating him (never to become married). Another thing, sometimes during these fantasies i'll randomly come to reality and think, (do i really think sucking weiner and get weiner shoved up my arse feels good? Skin tastes gross to me.) and also I hate tge traits of a steriotypical gay. Especially the voice, it may just because It reminds me of me, but i distance myself...

  
  
  Hahaha skin taste doesn't have anything to do with being gay or not. Also, it seems to me to be lust not attraction. Like I said I went through the same thing, just do whatever feels natural. If at any point it feels wrong then just stop. If you're comfortable with it then by all means go bang your friend :thumb: just make sure he's fine with it too. There are other things I would say if this was in Rua's House but you probably don't have access to that forum so I won't bother, this is already borderline.
• Phunkie wrote on 2011-08-10 20:13

  Quote from Purrz24;547028:

  First things first, I do not see gayness as normal, but it certainly feels natural. If you don'tknow what I mean, heres a serious idea thats going through my head. I'm still atttracted to girls, so i don't think i could bring my self to marry a man. But i dream that if I do get married and have kids an all that, (dont laugh, its silly...) ill still have sexual affairs with this guy.
  
  I see him only for sex, but I can imagine at most seriously dating him (never to become married). Another thing, sometimes during these fantasies i'll randomly come to reality and think, (do i really think sucking weiner and get weiner shoved up my arse feels good? Skin tastes gross to me.) and also I hate tge traits of a steriotypical gay. Especially the voice, it may just because It reminds me of me, but i distance myself...

  
  
  You keep mentioning this one guy. Are your fantasies almost always about him or does it involve men in general?
  
  It sounds more like lust than an actual sexual preference.
  
  And being gay is completely normal. It may seem a little unusual for you, since this is probably the first time you're encountering feelings of any kind towards members of the same-sex. But yeah, like you said, it's completely natural.
  
  I used to be kinda similar to you at first. But you become more and more open-minded as you keep embracing yourself and your sexuality, be you straight, bisexual or gay.
  
  If you want to experiment and see what feels right, I say go for it. Just be safe.
• animeshadows wrote on 2011-08-10 23:06

  Quote from Purrz24;546771:

  Ever since this year, i've been having fantasies aboutother guys in my grade... I really dont want to be gay, but I can' t help it and it feels horrible. I've heard that people going through puberty might have these troubles but I don't know if that's my case. It got really intense this summer. One of my good team mates... I am extremely attracted to him. We got really close this summer because of training for nationals ( yay for any competitors out there who went to 2011 Junior Olympics in SanJose ^^), we worked out alot together. Then it wasnt really bad, but he invited me to go house sit with him and we ended up sleeping together half naked(other than that nothing sketchy happened). Sometimes we change together in the same room after a workout, and I get sorta turned on... But the thing is i naturally hate this type of person ( hes pretty fake... And tells buttsmelly jokes no one laughs at..) yet I think about him 24/7. I thinkmaybe he might be gay too because he rubs up against me and cuddles(?) me all the time jokingly. The thing is, hes also strictly catholic, ( and u know the problem here...). What should I do QQ i dun wanna be gai. Is this just puberty?

  
  
  //raises hand// Hello. My name is John and I am a Bisexual Catholic. (//Failed attempt to break the stereotype)
  
  Anyway, I first started having feelings towards the other gender around 2008. (I remember this because it was right when I started playing Mabinogi.) I denied it for a year, and the following broke down because I didn't want to be bisexual and/or gay. There is no real way to tell if you are/aren't "gay" persay by this, as when males go through puberty it is noted in many studies that their sexual orientation changes rapidly and often in some cases. It will take you a few years to find out.
  
  But here's the longer portion of what I have to say: Gender Binary/Sexual Binary does not exists. It is impossible to be straight or homosexual. All straight persons will have feelings for their own gender, whether very subtle or full on, as well as homosexuals to opposite gendered people. The question is HOW MUCH DENIAL the one is in about this thing and how determined they are to surpress this fact. Sexuality is a scale in my opinion, with attraction to men on one side and women on the other. Nobody can be at any far end of the scale, and falls somewhere in the middle. [S](There's actually been some recent studies that sexuality is the result of levels of certain chemicals in the brain. BABY YOU WERE BORN THIS WAY.)[/S]
  
  Tl;dr, you have nothing to worry about right now. Your friend may joke cuddle, but seriously that is a joke. There are a lot of guys at my school actually that are hella straight and know I'm bisexual, and flirt with me in nonjoking ways; I don't really understand why they do it, but hey. Such is life. If you do end up identifying yourself as gay/pan/bisexual, congratulations. (For me, it took a few years to become comfortable to come out of the closet.)
  
  Oh, and also, about the whole Catholic thing. The whole "anti-gay" thing spawns from Leveticus, which I've read. It also says that Women on their periods are evil and should not be touched or slept next to during their cycle, that haircuts are an obama-nation, and shellfish are unclean. So pretty much everything in there has been ignored by society other than the one sentence about gays. (Basically, it shouldn't apply anymore.)
• Zid wrote on 2011-08-10 23:23
  My only advice is that you shouldn't let that guy's religion choice deter the flow of what you're going through.
• Cynic wrote on 2011-08-11 00:02
  I kind of hope you are gay for the sake of irony.
  
  ..Kidding. Sort of.
  
  Basically, it's as everyone said; it's normal, there is nothing wrong with it. Don't bother relying on the cruel BS you were probably taught about members of the LGBT community.
• Zeo wrote on 2011-08-11 03:20
  Like other people said, it's normal too. And I'm not sure if you've heard of this term but... you could be bisexual instead of gay if you find yourself attracted to both genders.
• RebeccaBlack wrote on 2011-08-12 05:49

  Quote from Purrz24;546771:

  Ever since this year, i've been having fantasies aboutother guys in my grade... I really dont want to be gay, but I can' t help it and it feels horrible. I've heard that people going through puberty might have these troubles but I don't know if that's my case. It got really intense this summer. One of my good team mates... I am extremely attracted to him. We got really close this summer because of training for nationals ( yay for any competitors out there who went to 2011 Junior Olympics in SanJose ^^), we worked out alot together. Then it wasnt really bad, but he invited me to go house sit with him and we ended up sleeping together half naked(other than that nothing sketchy happened). Sometimes we change together in the same room after a workout, and I get sorta turned on... But the thing is i naturally hate this type of person ( hes pretty fake... And tells buttsmelly jokes no one laughs at..) yet I think about him 24/7. I thinkmaybe he might be gay too because he rubs up against me and cuddles(?) me all the time jokingly. The thing is, hes also strictly catholic, ( and u know the problem here...). What should I do QQ i dun wanna be gai. Is this just puberty?

  
  It could be a phase.
  
  But it's probably not.
  
  I can't speak for everyone, but when I first realized I was into guys, people thought it was a phase and, well, it wasn't.
  
  I suppose all you can do is wait.
• Navy wrote on 2011-08-12 09:16
  You seem young, so it may very well be a phase.
  After puberty as we being to mature into young adults we begin to explore our sexuality.
  I wouldn't say you're bi-sexual, I'd say you're bi-curious (I've been there myself but overall I'm straight)
  
  But whatever you do don't closet yourself, I'm not saying flaunt your sexuality like it's a prize (that's annoying) but NEVER try to be something you're not.
  
  There's nothing wrong with being gay and as for the skin and butt part
  not everyone who is gay does those acts
  
  some guys don't like giving girls head, and some girls don't like sucking cock
  
  it goes both ways, don't be afraid to accept who you are as an individual.
• Aliyah wrote on 2011-08-12 09:35

  Quote from Stride;549457:

  You seem young, so it may very well be a phase.
  After puberty as we being to mature into young adults we begin to explore our sexuality.
  I wouldn't say you're bi-sexual, I'd say you're bi-curious (I've been there myself but overall I'm straight)
  
  But whatever you do don't closet yourself, I'm not saying flaunt your sexuality like it's a prize (that's annoying) but NEVER try to be something you're not.
  
  There's nothing wrong with being gay and as for the skin and butt part
  not everyone who is gay does those acts
  
  some guys don't like giving girls head, and some girls don't like sucking cock
  
  it goes both ways, don't be afraid to accept who you are as an individual.

  
  
  ^Agreed.
  
  Puberty was a crazy time. Even with just guys, I would rapidly change what kind of man I was attracted to. If I listed all the odd crushes I had, guys and girls... And some days, I swear I wanted to jump anything that moved. xD
  
  You have lots of time to figure out what works for you. You don't have to jump into the physical aspect of a relationship right away. Its going to sound corny, but do what feels right in your heart. The most important thing is for you to be happy and content with who you are :cheer: