I wasn't sure if I wanted to post this here, as I'd probably have done it in Rua's House, but I think there are some people that don't have access to it that I'd like to see their responses. ALSO, THIS IS A LONG READ, WITH NO TL;DR.
So, those of you that remember this thread: http://mabination.com/threads/20828-Ok-I-need-to-ask-everyone-a-serious-question....
About my grandmother and I. December 25th, 2012 she went to the hospital for congestive heart failure and fluid in lungs. Some months later, on May 27th, she went back to the hospital for congestive heart failure and a touch of pneumonia. Came back home, then went back on June 1st because she had an infection from the medicine (Made the back of her left leg turn red).
Earlier this morning, around 12 a.m., she went back to the hospital because she was having a heart attack. About 2 hours later, my aunt called my mom and I and told us she was unconscious. My mom teared up, I comforted her and told her just incase to prepare for the "call." About 30min later, my aunt called again. I braced myself, handed the phone to mom and as soon as my mom said, "Oh, my god." I knew what had happened. At the age of 85, with her birthday being tomorrow, June 20th, my grandmother is gone. We didn't get along that well, being complete opposites. . .honestly, I didn't feel understood. To expand upon that, ever since I came back to stay with her after Christmas break, my goal has been to attempt to "fix" our relationship. For someone like me, that has all of that "resentment" towards her, but still loves her for all shes done, it wouldn't be easy. However, I wanted to try to fix what I could and wanted her to be there when I graduated from college. I can say that I have changed, not the change I wanted, but better at least. The ironic and painful thing is that. . .
I understand now how Zoey felt in Left 4 Dead. I'll place a spoiler for those that don't know the ending of Left 4 Dead Sacrifice [SPOILER="Spoiler"]Zoey and Bill got into an argument near the end of the comic. When Bill sacrificed himself to save the others, it hit Zoey the hardest because they never got a chance to make up.[/SPOILER] Basically, earlier that day, I was playing TF2, doing MvM Big Rock Adv and at that point, we were being pushed back by the bots, on wave 3 with those 45 crit bowmen that never miss. So, I was helping hold them back as Demoman, with 4 heads when my grandmother called me to get something for her in her room. At the time, if I did help, I'd have not only died and lost my heads, but my team would most likely lose because I'm very important. (That and teams have sucked so far). So, I told her I was busy and my Aunt was over there, so I figured she could help. That day was also Deitylight's birthday so we went to the gym because Monday it rained cats and dogs. After coming back, my mom mentioned that gram was complaining about me being "busy." Quite frankly, it irritated me because its been sometime since I actually pulled that on her. A good amount of time matter of fact, as even when I did Big Rock in the past 3-4 weeks or so or was playing Vindi, when she called, I'd jump up and go see what she wanted. When the heart attack was happening, she called my mom. I didn't think much of it, but when she did it a second time in rapid succession and with panic in her voice, I springed up and helped her on the bed. Mom was about to take a shower, so I stayed by her side, rubbed her back and tried to help her stay calm. We called my Aunt and 911 soon after, and then the events unfolded. Before we got the news, I told my mom how it was ironic that she'd be in the hospital again on her birthday, since she complained about the terrible food and how they had issues finding her veins and stuck her full of needles. I had planned what I was going to say in a card to make amends, but now I'll never get the chance. The funeral is supposed to be this Saturday, and. . .I really hate funerals. They're so emotional, sad and depressing (Which, some of you know I've been a crybaby most of my life and am emotionally sensitive, which has caused more negatives than positives, so it really irks me.) I have an idea of what I'm going to say, it's the least I feel I can do at this point. . .:gloom3: