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Phunkie wrote on 2012-05-05 06:37
And holy shit, I feel great.
I can actually taste the freedom.
First person is no longer a friend. He's bipolar and unbelievable. Loves to smoke weed like crazy and is pretty manipulative. I just got sick of it today.
We had been arguing for over a week and I was slowly losing light of why I was still his friend. Today, he made me snap.
Called him all the names in the book. Told him that he just used me for money and company, while he didn't bring anything to the table in our friendship. Told him also to stop missing his damn pills.
I'm pretty sure he's a certified psycho.
On 4/20, he met a kid at some McDonald's and went home with him and fucked him on one of his "manic episodes." Beyond ridiculous.
You see, I care about the people in my life and so I voiced out my concern, like strongly. And he just kept dismissing my advice. Told him he needed better influences in his life. He dismissed that too, so I was like nah, fuck you.
Second person is my friend who was pregnant. Convinced her to get that abortion, so she's baby-free. But man, she's just so irresponsible with her life that I told her today that she was a bad influence for me and that I wanted to focus more on me.
She smokes weed like crazy too. Fucking potheads.
She's pretty mad at me, but I really don't care at this point. I'm sure she used me for money too. No, fuck that. She did, period. Don't need that crap anymore.
I feel a little stressed, especially after those two arguments, but I feel good.
I'm finally standing up for myself and what I need, and those two low-lives, I could do without them.
I need good people around me. Positive energy. People like that are just "stuck."
Have you ever literally told someone you didn't want to be his or her friend anymore?
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Piero wrote on 2012-05-05 06:57
Good for you, Joel!
They obviously need to go to therapy and perhaps rehab, since they're freaking crazy.
And I'm confused? Did he like rape the kid or...
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Phunkie wrote on 2012-05-05 06:57
Quote from Piero;856251:
Good for you, Joel!
They obviously need to go to therapy and perhaps rehab, since they're freaking crazy.
And I'm confused? Did he like rape the kid or...
Nah, he was just horny and looking for an easy lay.
The kid is homeless btw. That's the part which gets me. :XD::XD:
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User495 wrote on 2012-05-05 07:00
Quote from Phunkie;856234:
Have you ever literally told someone you didn't want to be his or her friend anymore?
yep, which is why I can count all my friends with my hand now
but, good job, being a pothead had never been a good sign of a good friend to begin with
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Kayate wrote on 2012-05-05 07:03
I would of already landed a few punches against that pot head guy if I had a friend like him. People like him annoy the hell out of me.
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Taycat wrote on 2012-05-05 07:10
Joel, I think you need to have a nice little Tinychat with all your nation friends.
Make your weekend better, yeah?
ouob
Also, good job getting bad influences out of your life. I know how you feel since I did the same some time ago.
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Chillax wrote on 2012-05-05 07:11
I haven't had friends with such colorful characters myself, but good for you.
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Himeko wrote on 2012-05-05 07:11
It must have been really tough, in some cases after you've exhausted everything to try to help someone or be a positive influence on their life you just have to move forward.
I think it's great to try to help people and maybe in a way by no longer letting them use you for money and showing them what happens when you treat friends in such a way, they'll learn something. At least you can hope, as you move on with your life, that your efforts will have helped them grow as a person, perhaps not now, but in the long run when they remember your attempts to help them and find themselves stuck in bad situations.
I have in a way experienced what you did in a way, except this was for someone I was dating, but at the same time they were still one of my closest friends.
His friends got him involved in some pretty bad situations with drugs and street racing, such as getting pulled over by cops while his friends had drugs in the car, among other things. I expressed to him time and time again, that I was against him being around that kind of thing D: and gave him a lot of advice but he always shrugged it off. It was hard to deal with someone screwing up their life and laughing about it, while I was sitting there worried and trying to help.
It's really frustrating when you see someone who tells you about their goals in life that you care about, throwing their opportunities away and watch them be surrounded by bad influences.
He even started to sell drugs because of his friends and was just getting involved in so many things I wanted no part of, that I ended up ending it. I gave him my reasons and hoped that he would set his life straight after realizing what he had lost because of his actions.
That aside, I'm glad you feel better now :D and hopefully down the line you'll hear good news just in passing about them.
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Phunkie wrote on 2012-05-05 07:19
Quote from Himeko;856267:
It must have been really tough, in some cases after you've exhausted everything to try to help someone or be a positive influence on their life you just have to move forward.
I think it's great to try to help people and maybe in a way by no longer letting them use you for money and showing them what happens when you treat friends in such a way, they'll learn something. At least you can hope, as you move on with your life, that your efforts will have helped them grow as a person, perhaps not now, but in the long run when they remember your attempts to help them and find themselves stuck in bad situations.
Holy crap. You don't how hard it was...
Had to grab all my courage to finally do this. And I had to be blunt, so I may have come off as a douchebag, but I just couldn't be nice about it anymore. There's just so much you can do to help someone.
And then I realized, shit, Joel. You can't save someone who doesn't want to saved. In their minds, they think they're functioning great, with a few little mistakes here and there. They were just bringing me down with them.
I have in a way experienced what you did in a way, except this was for someone I was dating, but at the same time they were still one of my closest friends.
His friends got him involved in some pretty bad situations with drugs and street racing, such as getting pulled over by cops while his friends had drugs in the car, among other things. I expressed to him time and time again, that I was against him being around that kind of thing D: and gave him a lot of advice but he always shrugged it off. It was hard to deal with someone screwing up their life and laughing about it, while I was sitting there worried and trying to help.
Oh man, that's awful.
You don't talk to him anymore, right?
It's really frustrating when you see someone who tells you about their goals in life that you care about, throwing their opportunities away and watch them be surrounded by bad influences.
Amen. Really, a lot of people these days are genuinely lost and when someone who wants good things for them comes around, they just push 'em away. It's like they dunno how to fix their own problems; like digging their own grave, sorta. It's miserable to watch, even as a friend.
That aside, I'm glad you feel better now :D and hopefully down the line you'll hear good news just in passing about them.
I just wish the best for them honestly.
Perhaps they'll run into someone one day who will have the patience I didn't have and who will truly help them.
I'm just not said person. I don't want to be. I love myself too much.
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Cucurbita wrote on 2012-05-05 08:10
Whats with people and smoking shit? I go out with my friends and have a blast without touching anything. Even drinking seems pointless to me. Had to drop a few friends because the moment they turned 21 all they did with their free time was get wasted. Drunk people aren't fun, they're annoying. The novelty wears off after the first few times.
I don't think theres a problem drinking every once in a while but feels like it shows how much you under-appreciate everything in life if you have to use some sort of brain altering substance to have a good time.
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Ithiliel wrote on 2012-05-05 08:26
I'm glad you got the courage to do that, it can be hard but at the end of the day you don't need people like that in your life.
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Phunkie wrote on 2012-05-05 08:28
Quote from Ithiliel;856304:
I'm glad you got the courage to do that, it can be hard but at the end of the day you don't need people like that in your life.
My insides are burning with rage though.
Think a good night's sleep is gonna help it a little?
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Ithiliel wrote on 2012-05-05 08:29
Quote from Phunkie;856305:
My insides are burning with rage though.
Think a good night's sleep is gonna help it a little?
To be honest, no. It'll take time for you to get over it, which makes sense. Just don't let the rage take over, it's exhausting.
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Sumpfkraut wrote on 2012-05-05 09:55
On an additional upside,
losing a good friend might make them think a little.
Being a friend isn't always the right way to help people.
Quote from Phunkie;856305:
My insides are burning with rage though.
Think a good night's sleep is gonna help it a little?
If you're that full of rage, going to sleep will present itself as difficult already.
And no, a good night of sleep might not do the job, you're probably gonna think back at some point, and unless your brain works in a really special way that'll cause arousal during at least the next few days, but probably weeks. It's worth it though. Also you might have a sort of background noise stomach ache throughout the first days (
maybe it's different for people, that's what I get anyway), but it's nothing worrisome.
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Cynic wrote on 2012-05-05 09:57
Good for you.
There's no use trying to help people who refuse your help and/or are just too far down the road to really do anything. All you can do is try, and after that point they either need to work with you or fly off on their own.
It's especially good to hear your female friend did the right thing. Now the poor kid won't have to suffer any more due to her mistakes.
Like I said before, there's nothing wrong with being somewhat optimistic, friendly and helpful.. but some people just aren't worth helping, assuming they even want/accept your help in the first place. It's also good to be realistic and level-headed about things; you can't fix everyone and you can't make everyone happy without making yourself sad/frustrated in the process. I can see the appeal in acting like that, but too much of anything is usually bad.